Timothy Nohe
In the near future, minutes from now, xenotransplantation artists will assemble great quickening masses of human organs harvested from pygmy pigs. The artists will select donor animals from screened, closed herds as free as possible of infectious agents and of the highest esthetic value. Obviously, only the most exclusive cutting-edge galleries will option trans-species organ sculptures. Discerning clients, exhausted by the wait for authentic human organs harvested from slaughtered prisoners, suicides or accident victims, will select only prime works. No trans-species rejection is anticipated, no interpersonal drama in pleading for a sibling's marrow. We have entered a new era - that of artist's sculpted xenotransplanted flesh, eyes, arteries, lungs, livers, and hearts. In the near future, minutes from now, female artists between the ages of 21 - 33 will exchange their eggs for direct electronic currency transfers. Limited editions of artist's oocytes shall be harvested to enable the infertile to conceive privileged non-artists. To enhance the value of the eggs, all donor artists will submit to psychological evaluation and genetic and infectious disease screenings. Cryostorage of the female artist's gamete is anticipated as an ideal method of conservation, and shall provide a stable medium to established provenance. Male artists will certainly continue to unproductively masturbate with no takers for their profligate issue. In the near future, minutes from now, artists will deploy artificially intelligent vehicles capable of loitering over areas of interest for up to 18 hours. These highly efficient, unmanned vehicles will be equipped with infrared and video cameras, side-scanning radar, motion sensors and eavesdropping assets that may gather an endless stream of data from any terrestrial source. Cultural institutions need only to provide GPS coordinates to the artist, and, within 24 hours, a constant datastream will be provided via secure T-1 connections. Art and artists shall truly become omnipresent in culture, extending the full range of our senses over new horizons. In the near future, minutes from now, artists will produce spectacular digital video dramas captured from surreptitiously placed wireless nanny-cams and security monitors. Roving pirate video auteurs in search of cinéma vérité, pornographic scenes of entanglement, and domestic anomie will pull footage from the thin suburban air. Movie sets will no longer be required; office cubicles, the loading dock, the living room, the bedroom and the bassinet are in the air. And who will star in this wireless drama, an amateur cast of infants and children, straying spouses, unknowing teens, caretakers, security guards, laborers, domestics, tenants, and low-level employees? Anyone can and will be a star in the new wireless cinema. In the near future, minutes from now... Timothy Nohe Baltimore |
